Scott Pilgrim's Overrated Girlfriend: Why Scott Shouldn't End Up with Ramona Flowers

Warning: Spoilers for up to Volume 5. You have been warned.

About this time next week, we'll all know how Scott Pilgrim ends. When Volume 6 comes out, canon will be canon, and the only hope alternative shippers is in fix fics and fan comics. Thus, this is the last chance to say what I want to say about the relationships of Scott Pilgrim without sounding like some crazy and bitter Harry/Hermonie shipper who, after the release of the Deathly Hallows, sent JKR death threats regarding how she ruined their OTP.. So while I still can, I must assert that I don't really want Scott to end up with Ramona.

Let me start off by saying that I don't detest the couple. They have had their moments, here and there. In fact, the entirety of volume 4 almost sold me on the relationship. However, there have been a couple consistent threads throughout Scott Pilgrim that have given me reason to think she's bad news.

One such thread is that the vast majority of her exes turned evil after her, or in some cases explicitly because of her. In the Matthew Patel flashback, we see him gritting his teeth in anger after Ramona dumps him. Lucas Lee sells out after Ramona cheated on him with Todd. (Todd, admittedly, is perhaps the only evil ex that we know was evil the whole damn time.) Roxanne's abrasive demeanor was suggested to stem from bitterness over comments that Ramona made about her. And let us not forget the twins, whose creepy twin act was directly born out the incident where she played them off each other.

Speaking of the twins, Ramona is very much so a hypocrite. Okay, what Scott did in volume 1 was fairly reprehensible, it wasn't nearly as bad as anything that she's done, given that she mutually cheated on a pair of brothers. She has little right to get as angry as she did at Scott. Besides, he at least ended it fairly quickly, where as with regards to Ramona, we still aren't sure if she really ended with Gideon.

Her still being involved with Gideon is a distinct possibility. Envy's suggestion in volume 3 hinted her work for Gideon was less than legitimate, and the journey into Ramona's mind during volume 4 gave me the feeling that Gideon was very controlling in the relationship. (She was sitting right next to him, like a pet.) Combined with Ramona's disappearance at the end of volume 5, we can probably guess that Gideon still has her around his finger.

But let's be honest, the main reason I don't ship Scott/Ramona is that I think he can do better. Let's see if you can guess who I'm thinking here.

Knives Chau? No. She's batshit insane and immature. Besides, she's probably going to end up with Stephen Stills in the end, so I think she's covered.

Wallace? Hey, look, Wallace already has a boyfriend. Besides Wallace is too awesome for Scott. Moving on...

Lisa? Okay, while I think she and Scott would make a very good couple, I think I should remind you that Scott ignored her in highschool for someone else. Someone snakier. And more talented. Someone with freckles and looks very good chained to a wall.

Yes, I'm a Kim Pine shipper, and I think I've been since the flashback sequence in volume 2. Kim is not only one of the funniest characters in the book, she's proven herself to be the most loyal, leagues above Ramona. Whereas Ramona has done very little to show that she cares for Scott, Kim did an extremely self sacrificing act during volume six in order to get him motivated enough to beat the twins. And even though she occasionally call Scott an idiot, or chews him out for doing something stupid, she has demonstrated a degree of faith in him that's missing from Ramona, which can be best summed up in her repeating mantra from volume 5, “Come on, he's Scott Pilgrim!” And judging by her behavior over the book, it's very obvious that she still has feelings for Scott, even though they broke it off in high school.

Now while I would prefer Scott/Kim, I know that series will end up with Ramona magically changing into a better person after Scott gives Gideon the beat down. I will have no choice but to accept it and smile at the end. But tell me, fellow Scott Pilgrim fans, who really deserves Scott? The person who has constantly cheats and turns people evil? Or the smart, sarcastic girl next door who is loyal till the end?